Self-doubt is normal. Even the most successful people may suffer from self-doubt, which is having a feeling of uncertainty about one or more aspects of yourself. Self-doubt is that nagging inner voice that questions your capabilities, decision making and even self-worth. When self-doubt overtakes you, it can control your life and your business. You may struggle with:
· Constant need for reassurance
· Second-guessing your decisions
· Fear of failure that inhibits decisive action
· Inability to assert yourself
· Risk avoidance
· Anxiety
Understanding the roots of self-doubt
Understanding what causes self-doubt helps to begin to deal with that inner voice that is holding you back and sabotaging your ambitions with negativity. You may find that what causes self- doubt comes from harsh criticism in your past. Such seeds of self-doubt can emerge even when you are on the brink of success because you inherently lack confidence. Being a perfectionist or a people pleaser can also instill fear of making mistakes, so you begin to doubt your instincts and judgements.
Regardless of what causes self-doubt, the anxiety and lack of confidence that you feel can keep you from taking the next big move that will take your spa or massage practice to the next level. You may lack confidence to learn new skills such as sports massage, oncology massage, or prenatal massage or whatever other vertical market or treatment protocol you find of interest.
Self-doubt can keep you from exploring partnership opportunities – whether with another professional or even a co-marketing arrangement - because you have fears about entrusting your success to someone else and lack confidence in your ability to manage the relationship.
Self-doubt may inhibit you from seeking counsel from others in the marketplace because you fear you are exposing weakness or admitting your lack of knowledge.
Can self-doubt be a positive force?
In some cases, self-doubt can be a motivator. A little bit of self-doubt can keep you from making rash decisions. Instead of acting impulsively, self-doubt can result in taking time to weigh options, assess risks and make more informed choices.
Self-doubt also can force you to take a critical look at your strengths and weaknesses and determine areas where you need to make improvement. In this way, self-doubt may motivate you to continually seek knowledge to enhance your professional expertise and/or skills at running your business.
You also may look at your self-doubt as a challenge in and of itself to overcome.
Overcoming self-doubt
There are ways to overcome self-doubt. Among them:
Face your fears: One of the best ways to deal with self-doubt is to face up to the things that scare you the most. Write down your thoughts, if necessary. When you can see the conflict you have, you can begin to deal with it, even if it means taking small steps.
Think of previous successes: Start overcoming self-doubt by reflecting on what went right and your recent achievements. Instead of being overly critical, give yourself credit for accomplishments, even small ones. Every accomplishment is another step toward reaching bigger goals.
Get out of your comfort zone: Be willing to be uncomfortable for a while. You may need to talk to people you have never talked to before or do something you have never done before. You need to be willing to live with discomfort for the short term to achieve what you want for the long term.
Set realistic goals: You want long-term goals, but you also need to establish attainable, short-term ones to help in overcoming self-doubt. When big goals are not immediately met, it’s easy to let doubt creep in. Achieving smaller goals along the way reinforces that you are on the right track.
Be decisive: Act. Your inner doubt may be making you question yourself and get in the way of you taking decisive action. This is self-sabotage. Decide and commit to action, whatever it takes.
Change your associations: If someone in your life is contributing to your self-doubt, make a change. Connect with people personally and professionally who encourage you to take risks and can offer advice to get you on the right track. Also seek constructive feedback from those who have valuable insights and who validate your skills and efforts.
Get positive inputs: Are you processing the same thoughts every time you face a new challenge? The answer may be to change the inputs. Find out how others deal with challenges. Read more articles or books on business and deal with risk of finding new ways to look at situations. By changing the input, you can change the outcome.
Do not compare yourself to others: Your concern about what others think about you may contribute to your self-doubt. Do not compare yourself to others or let their success hold you back from taking risks. Set your own benchmark for success.
Change your self-talk: Change your perspective by the way you communicate with yourself. Is your glass half full or half empty? When your self-talk conveys optimism and confidence, you in turn change your behavior.
Find an advisor: Find someone you trust and seek advice from. Look for someone who has gone through a comparable situation and find out how they dealt with it. You will find they too had doubts but worked through them.
Create scenarios: Make a list of worst case scenarios and create plans for dealing with each situation. By working out options if things should not work out as you hope; you may be able to alleviate the anxiety that is holding you back.
Adopt a mindset of success: For every doubtful thought, change your perspective. Instead of considering a negative outcome, challenge yourself to consider what is the best outcome you can expect. Doing so allows excitement to replace fear and encourages you to move forward with enthusiasm.
By overcoming self-doubt, you will emerge with
· More self-confidence
· Stronger decision making
· Increased resilience
· A better sense of well-being.
It is natural to experience self-doubt. But by taking the right steps to overcome uncertainly, you will continue to move your business ahead and enjoy the success you envisioned when you went into business.